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Vanessa | 19 | Fl
I'm currently in the middle of my second semester at Saint Petersburg College. I wash your test tubes, I prep your dissections.

I am a math and science kind of girl. I don't watch television or go to the movies. My kind of entertainment is watching MIT lectures on youtube and gazing up at the stars.

I am a full-time college student. I work. I'm in a relationship. And I guess, everything written here is just proof that life is just an illusion after all.

guttedsquid
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Country: United States


Interests: M&S all the way. I don't know shit about pop culture, but I can find you a derivative, and can explain alternation of generations better than a bryophyte could.
Expertise: thinking too much
Occupation: Lab Technician


Message: message me
Website: visit my website


Member Since: 8/18/2008

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Harry Potter is for Cool Kids too
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smarter people have dirtier minds
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escapism.
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this is growing up.
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Procrastinating College Students
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music on. world off.
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because it made you smile
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this is the way i think.
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Saturday, March 06, 2010

Flying

I guess I'm not happy right now because I think i pissed Payden off. Or maybe he just fell asleep. All I know is that when I call his phone I don't hear him say "Hey you!" all excited and cheery-like. :/
barnacle x400

barnacles!


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Thursday, March 04, 2010

Totally got the run around

It took me million phone calls and a million different phone numbers to get a physicians bill removed from my credit.
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Wednesday, March 03, 2010

It was my birthday

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I love college, but I hate these exam-test-report-due vortexes. I didn't realize it was my birthday until my little sister woke me up and sang "Happy Birthday."


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Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Scratch that

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Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Finally getting the hang of things

College defies routine.
I'm figuring out how to balance everything in proportion.
I just can't figure out where my personal relationships are leading me.
I hope this semester brings me closer to Payden.
I guess that is all I can ask for.
I wouldn't care if that meant starving.
Burning, or drowning, bleeding... who cares? Nothing at the moment matters as much as how much it hurts to miss him.
Every time I catch the clock just right, every time I see a dandelion, a lady bug, a burning hunk of space crap...
The only thing I wish is for the two of us to work out.
I live for the moments we spend laughing at ourselves.
I live for no one else.



CIMG4283



Just thought I'd mention the newest of the new: I had Payden cut off my hair while he was in Florida last weekend. He took a buzzer to it, with the biggest attachment on, so now my hair is just-over-an-inch long. I fucking love it. Mom thinks I look butch. Not that I care, because I obviously suck dick. It just pisses me off that she can be as cut-throat as she pleases but the minute I call her a bitch to her face she goes hysterical. Irrationality at its best. Pure lack of communication skills at its worst.

I got asked "why" a lot yesterday. They will never understand. But Payden does. He knows as well as I do how sick I am of labels. I'm puerto-rican so I'm supposed to be ghetto as fuck and three times pregnant. I'm a woman so I belong in the kitchen. I was raised catholic so sex is taboo. I'm a calculus kid so I'm supposed to be awkward and meager. Shave your legs, straighten your hair, be everything you hate, buy our products, eat our media, live our ideal...

Fuck that. No hair, pierced tits, neon pants, cigarette between my lips, 3.769 GPA, post-doc after fucking post-doc; I'll reshape your stereotype one day at a time. I'll prove to you a woman doesn't have to be a mommy. I'll Dr. Vanessa Rivera before I ever put on heels and nylons.



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